It’s been about a year since I found my passion while being creative with my life and living fear-lessly. Yes you read that right; fearing less. The moment I decided that I wasn’t going to let fear control my every move, fear that was hindering my ability to see my worth and keeping me from exploring a life of joy and purpose. This in no way completely removed fear from my life, because fear is and will always be part of the human experience. I still struggle to this day with fearful thoughts. However at this time, I slowly began to change the way I think about things. I began to believe that failure was not a set back, but an opportunity to progress and a stepping stone for success. I decided to try things, create things, and make things regardless of what I thought others were thinking or allowing my own thoughts to hold me back. To try, just to try. To experience new things. To grow. To be scared, but to do it anyway. I’ve experienced so much on this journey, and I want to share with you a few thoughts and things I’ve learned along the way. I am in no way an expert, but I think there are benefits to being vulnerable, honest, and open with what I’ve learned. If you’re looking to make a change and to hone in on your passion, here are some steps I took:
Try something new.
Get out there and try a new thing you’ve been desperately wanting to do but haven’t had the time/money/energy/effort to do it. Now is the perfect time. I love this quote on finding your passion from Marie Forleo: “Clarity comes from engagement, not thought.” We find our passion by taking action. I’m sure you’ve thought all about the things you want to do in life, but maybe have yet to really take a leap and try. So today, take a small step and do something. That’s all it takes!
Try something new despite what your thoughts are telling you.
Man y’all my thoughts tell me every stinkin’ day that no one really cares about what I have to say. That I’m not making or saying anything that is worth putting out there. That I don’t know what I’m doing and how dare I think that I do. That this really isn’t my passion. That I look stupid. That I’m trying to be something I’m not. I literally could go on and on about the terrible things that my thoughts tell me to try to convince me not to make art, not to try new things, not to have a blog, not to keep sharing my ideas. Whenever I start to feel anxious, I remind myself of this truth that overshadows all the negative thoughts:
It’s OK to have fear, but despite these fears I’m going to keep doing what I’m doing because I bet that someone else out there can relate and may need encouragement, love, and support just like I do.
It doesn’t matter to me if only a single individual (like my Mom, love you Mom) cares about something I say or something I make. As long as whatever I made or said speaks joy and sheds light on a subject I’m struggling with and could help someone else who is going through the same thing, that is sufficient enough for me. That’s it. That’s all that’s required of me, that I keep showing up just for that. That is my personal passion in life.
Allow yourself to feel worthy, because you ARE worthy.
I’m going to be honest in school I was middle of the line, at best. But this is not because I couldn’t do great things, I simply limited myself. I KNEW I could do better, but I didn’t have the confidence to think that I really could. I did not know my potential. Or even if I did, something inside me didn’t believe it. Because of this I frequently fell into insecure comparison traps. I thought I would never be as good as so-and-so, or as talented, or as smart— so I didn’t even try. I would gossip. I’d criticize others. So much potential buried under lies I believed about myself. It was exhausting, and hindered me from creating really cool sh*t, or just sh*t that I was proud of. However no matter where I was before, I now believe I am worthy of creating cool sh*t. I’m allowed to make art that I like. I am not defined by a grade in school, a thought I have about my work, or even critical remarks on my work. I know that not everyone is going to like what I do. I know that with time, I’ll get better. I’ll do better. I’ll be better. I just had to tell myself that I was allowed to be better, and that I’m 100% worthy of it.
Remember that success is a process that leads to an end result.
Success does not happen overnight, yet we tend to think so when we see others doing big things and we feel stuck in the same place. Remember they had to start somewhere, and you gotta start somewhere too. My website is not where I want it to be, but it’s a start. I’ve created art and put it up on my Instagram and decided I didn’t like it. I’ve created a million-and-one paintings/letterings/projects and scraped them all. Heck, I started this blog and then let it sit in silence for a MONTH because I was paralyzed by my fear of a new responsibility and what others thought of me. I’m still learning to let that go and keep going. Eventually, someone will notice. And then another, and another. By the grace of God one day I’ll be able to say that I changed someone’s life with what I said or what I made. And that in my opinion is a goal worth striving for.
Believe that in His eyes, you are enough and will always be enough.
When I began to understand and accept the incredible amount of love God has for me, I gave up the need to compare myself to others. I gave up the need to hold myself back from trying new things. I gave up the need to hold on to fear. “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” 1 John 4:18-19. It’s not to say I don’t still do these things sometimes because I am human, but when I do I remind myself:
When I stumble, when I’m uncertain, I know there is a God who loves me for who I am, as I am, right where I am.
That’s it, y’all. It’s that simple. I don’t need to be better than anyone else except who I was yesterday. I am not perfect, by any means. But I remind myself that I can literally do anything I set my mind to because I am enough for Jesus. I am enough.
Do you believe you are enough, friend? Do you believe it deep down? Maybe you feel totally confident and think you know what you want, but still something feels missing. That despite your skill, knowledge, financial or personal success… You don’t feel totally satisfied. I know this feeling. I hope to encourage you to think a new thought today and tell yourself:
I am allowed to try something new–
to let go of my fears, find my passion,
and be creative with my life.
Praying for you,
Photography by: Megan Weaver